This is normal. I went through the same thing after my treatment ended. I felt like I would not live to see my daughter graduate, get married, or even grow up.
It will get better. It just takes time. Try to remember how strong you are. You will make it through this just as you have everything else.

Mucoepidermoid carcinoma-intermediate grade. Removed 3/05. Additional surgery to get clean margins and selective neck dissection 4/05. 30 lymph nodes removed. All clear!!