Michael, get it together and get treatment. This is a fight you can win. Don't overthink it, just get treatment.

I had stage IV with node involvement, had the surgery and the day after I got home was out pulling up ivy, a hard job that I was completely up to. When I finished rad and chemo, I went fishing. Yes, I was burned and bald, but the energy came back, the burns healed, and the hair grew. That was all three years ago and I am going full speed ahead, and you can too. I don't work, but all through treatment I did housekeeping and laundry and cooking. It took me a little longer, but I could do it. Do not think you will necessarily be laid so low you will be unable to function.

This is just an unfortunate bump in your road and to see it as going over a cliff is not being logical. Many, many people beat this awful disease, and it only takes a few months to do it. Not a bad tradeoff for many more years.

I am of the "throw everything at it the first time" school of thought, because that ups the chances it will not return. Your 60%, 70% and 80% recurrence numbers are all wrong. Even the generally accepted 50% five year survival is not good without the explanation that the numbers include people who refuse treatment, refuse to complete treatment, have other serious disease such as heart and liver, and those who continue to drink and smoke during and after treatment. Take those folks out, and the survival percentage goes way, way up. Given your young age and expected lifespan, you have everything to gain.

I know exactly how scary it is at the beginning, but once you begin treatment, things will improve mentally because you will know you are fighting, not just sitting back and wishing things were different. The only way things will improve is if you get on board a treatment plan.

And listen to Brian. There is no multilation involved. I wear my hair up so my neck is totaly exposed and not one person has ever noticed anything strange, not even children who say what they think.

Bottom line, you can do this and we will help.

Joanna, tough as nails, but means well