As Yogi Berra said: "It's Deja Vu, all over again". Your stories and posts each evoke similar experiences that both my wife and I have undergone. What's great is how we have all kept our sense of humor through these trials & tribulations.
The "how are you" thing is difficult. What is vexing is that no answer except some variant of DavidCPA's "Doing Great" is what is truly expected from you. I think everyone wants to be reassured that even if they did cancer, that it's no big deal what with "modern medicine" and all. And in indirect response to AmyK's observation, if you really answer with details about the pain, the frustration, the seemingly endless complications, the fear of recurrence, or any other facet of the "new normal", the good people are shocked and then avoid you, while the a**holes just nod and tell you "it'll get better" and then launch into an explanation of how their stubbed toe or hangnail or sunburn really hurts too.
To keep the ball rolling here is another actual comment - this one from my mother-in-law:
"Oh, some of the people here have had cancer and they went clogging right after their radiation treatment. Are you doing anything like that?"
PS. I am leaving in a few hours to try and drive the four hours to NJ (beach traffic) to go to another eighth grade reunion (Class of 61 turns 62)where surprisingly people who spurned me then have matured and rallied in support with cards and truly compassionate comments at last year's first reunion after 47 years. We had so much fun, we are doing it again. SO NO POSTS UNTIL MONDAY. HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND.