Im so sorry the results werent better news. I guess you are right that you cant pre-grieve. Nothing can prepare you for what will eventually come. Times like this make it harder to be the caregiver.

A new job would be a great way to keep you busy. Its a positive thing that will be helpful to you. Think of it as your own little escape. Hope you enjoy your new venture.

Best wishes with everything you both are facing.

Christine
SCC 6/15/07 L chk & by L molar both Stag I, age44
2x cispltn-35 IMRT end 9/27/07
-65 lbs in 2 mo, no caregvr
Clear PET 1/08
4/4/08 recur L chk Stag I
surg 4/16/08 clr marg
215 HBO dives
3/09 teeth out, trismus
7/2/09 recur, Stg IV
8/24/09 trach, ND, mandiblctmy
3wks medicly inducd coma
2 mo xtended hospital stay, ICU & burn unit
PICC line IV antibx 8 mo
10/4/10, 2/14/11 reconst surg
OC 3x in 3 years
very happy to be alive smile