Hi, Teresa,

Brian is in deep denial and doesn't yet understand he can lose the window of opportunity to act.

I also had SCC of my lower gum - an early stage. I was scared, and I didn't want to deal with it. But there it was, looming over my life like the elephant in the room. It forced me to face my fear: I was afraid I was going to die. I had to learn I could live with cancer. And I wanted to live. I wanted to live. I don't know what stage Brian is at emotionally, but I suspect he has been having some of these same feelings.

Calling Brian childish or scaring him into thinking about treatment will shut him down, but you know that. Talking with his friend seems to be a start because he's found someone with whom he can share his fear. Perhaps his friend can get Brian to start thinking rationally and listen to his doctors.

In the meantime, I'm glad you've found this site. The people here are wonderful, and you will find support you so badly need.

Take care,
Marlene