Today we meet our primary nurse from Hospice and tomorrow a social worker is coming to see me.
It's hard to post here, I'm in fear of scaring someone whom is just starting this journey.

We are now on a two hour around the clock pain schedule and most days I can barely see straight. I am hoping this new nurse (we've had 4-5 here in the last two days) can schedule a night nurse to stay with him at least once every other week through the night so I can get some rest. It's been months since I've been able to sleep through the night.

His pain meds have tripled within 48 hours and my poor husband still has terrible break-thru.
You can see the tumor growing daily and it scares the hell out of me, so many things scare me these days.

I don't know how much time he has, my only prayer is that he can find comfort in whatever time we have left.

He is in and out of consciousness most of the day, but when he's awake he is mostly miserable.

Family comes more now - it's heartbreaking that it had to get to this point before they finally started.
I know a lot of it was Doug's fault, he's always hated and still does hate what the AWFUL FLIPPING DISEASE has done to him and his once gorgeous self.
I try to remind him everyday that he is still the man I married and my love has only grown.

Thank you all for being here for me, being a caregiver is quite a lonely job.