There are issues when the reality of the finite nature of our existence no longer exists in a theoretical world perspective. You have to be the patient, in the foxhole, or whatever, to get it I think. Caregivers understand it, but respectfully said, not the same way that patients feel it. Give him space to come to it in his own time, in his own way. As to the getting him through treatment, it is also his experience, and for you it is a function of supportive understanding, and lots of patience.

I have been afraid many times, and most of them involved realizing that my situation might cross paths with my subsequent death in some respect. If he wasn't scared, if he wasn't afraid of the unknown, he would not be normal.

Besides these very real situations, he is also revealing his vulnerability, in all its nakedness, in front of the woman that he has always been the tough guy, can get through it guy, make it happen whatever it takes person. Men hide their vulnerabilities skillfully from those whose opinions they care the most about. He is going through something where he cannot do that effectively. He is uncertain what you think of this new aspect of him, and that is unsettling.

So there are likely multiple things at play. Don't push, he knows the board is here, he knows to seek out what he needs to know to make good decisions. He doesn't have to learn that by reading lots of potentially negative things that may not apply to him, which his unconscious will still consider to be possible negatives in his future�whether they are or not.