Nelie,
I've read your posts, and want to send you my support.
You've been through so much, and your husband has too, but with the help that you are seeking as a couple, it is what you both owe one another.
If it doesn't work, you will know that you did all you could do. And, hopefully, if it does work, you will find one another again.
Love Always,
Mandi

Husband diagnosed with stage III tonsil and floor of mouth cancer in August 2002. Three rounds of chemo/42 RAD treatments. Upper right lung lobectomy in March 2003. (Benign)