Well Gary, you gave good advice there I think.
On the day when I was going to see a lawyer and had really decided my marriage was over, he apparently had an attack of conscience and started making some noises about staying to work things out. I let him know pretty quickly that if he stayed it was to work things out, not to waffle around more, which meant he had to agree to go back to counseling (and HE had to call the counselor for an appointment so he couldn't later act like he was pressured into it by me). He agreed and he did call.

More importantly he had a day of just being reflective himself and actually seemed to genuinely realize how much he'd closed himself off to me emotionally during this whole cancer battle BECAUSE of the cancer being so scary. He was really genuinely remorseful. This is something I really had come to beleive he would never realize or really feel any remorse for and I'm still amazed he hsa seen it and how much pain it caused me.

Of course there's still a world of stuff to work on between us right now, I'm still leery of trusting him totally at this point but you were right that I couldn't see what the future would bring when I made that last post, Gary.