Hello All,

I have already written an email to Patty on this subject so this is not addressed to her.I have tried like the dickens to stay away from this site because I get extremely frustrated, and I hate to say things that may anger people.I am no longer able to contain myself so I hope you all take what I'm about to say in the manner it was intended.


You are all giving her great advise on the caretaker and survivor view on oral cancer.I wish I would have known that this site was here when Tony was going through his illness.The major probelm I have is that you're all trying to guide her on how to deal with oral melanoma.I have already searched this site for myself and the only discussions about oral melanoma have been from Patty,or myself.In retrospect this means that NONE of you have dealt with it.It is not SCC and stats and predications and all it don't apply.I'm fully aware that they lump all oral cancers into the same group but it just shouldn't be so.


When my Tony was dealing with this horrible disease,I was like a crazy man trying to educate myself with every piece of available information I could find.To my dismay there are only a few journal articles and papers evn written on this subject.I will give you all one stat I have come across.The odds of getting oral malignant melanoma are 1 in 2 million cases of recorded oral cancers.There has never been a recorded case of anyone living past 22 months regardless of which stage they have.So,since I know you all are probably cursing me right now I believe that Patty can handle these things.She is as just as anxious for any kind of information that she can get a hold of.The doctors are side stepping the issues with her and her family because they are clueless!!!!!There are going by the little that is documented and it isn't enough!!

I'm very sorry that I am coming across so boldly but if someone has clued me in on the fact that Tony didn't have a chance from the second he was diagnosed then we would have done things entirely different.I invite you all to log on to www.emedicine.com in the search terms input oral malignant melanoma.This is the most extensive article I have found, and maybe you'll understand what we're dealing with a bit more.I do not mean to diminish anyone or the suffering that you or your loved ones have dealt with.Oral cancers of all kinds are not pleasures to cope with.I appauld all of you who have endured the treatments and the pains and are living wonderful lives now.I wish you all many happy days free of pain and worry.Again I'm sorry if I came off to strong maybe I shouldn't have done this but I felt I had to.

Happy Thanksgiving to all