Stacey, WOW do you have alot on your plate!!! Ive seen many patients come thru here that had been stubborn. It makes things twice as hard for everyone involved. I always feel so bad for the caregiver who is running around in circles trying their best to advocate for their patient while the patient works at burying their head in the sand. This is a lose-lose situation with no good outcome. The caregiver gets frustrated and the patient feels they have no control over anything in their life so they will choose the only things they can control and wrongly focus on those things which negatively impact their progress.

Whenever I hear of patients not taking in enough I begin to warn them about being hospitalized for dehydration and malnutrition. This is NOT a good experience at all. It happened to me several times and I felt so sick I thought I was dying. My body ached from head to toe and I mentally wasnt quite with it either. I wouldnt wish this on my worst enemy! Since the patient has so few choices many times they will think skimping one day on water or nutrition wont hurt and its a big deal that they can make it up the next day. That next day never comes and it turns into a viscous cycle of playing catch up. Same goes for nausea, once medication is skipped it becomes very difficult to stop the nausea. When nauseous its not easy to get the 2500 calories and without the meds the nausea will happen. So something little like by not taking meds it becomes a game of catch up that can never be won.

You are doing a very good job at being a caregiver. You are learning and trying your very best only to be met with stubbornness. I hate to say this but you may just have to have a confrontation with your husband. Since he is obviously out of touch with the harsh reality that this is a life or death situation he may need to be reminded this really is a fight for his life and he better get on board and begin to take it seriously. You will have to switch over to your nurse from he** hat and tell him like it is. Ive never heard of anything so ridiculous as skipping rads since someone else would have to drive him there. Thats a big excuse and its just back to trying to control things that are beyond his grasp right now. Sure he will be mad but I think you would much rather have an angry husband than not have one. Im so very sorry to sound harsh!!! I really do understand you are in a tough situation. But without confronting things it wont change and he will continue the buried head in the sand routine. Life does not stop when someone gets sick and by pushing everyone away it doesnt help at all. Things must change and the only way things will get better is by bringing all this directly to your husband and forcing him to be an adult and face reality.

Im so sorry about everything you are dealing with!!!!