I hope I am not being intrusive here but for anyone wondering about having this conversation, I just wanted to recommend getting a copy of the "Five Wishes" form/booklet,
https://secure3.electronet.net/agingwithdignity/subCategory.cfm?SID=3&category_ID=1

which I think would be a great way to start a conversation about some of the more difficult issues including what someone might want at their funeral or memorial service, and medical intervention steps that they do or do not want taken and under what circumstances (it is much more detailed and thus asks you to think out these things ahead of time much more than a health care proxy).

When I was diagnosed with cancer, I got a copy free from my church (many churches and some human resource offices have these forms) but you can also order a copy at the web site above. I have been working on some of the things in mine, including what sort of service I want after I die, even though I hope to be alive for many more years. It's really something everyone should do to help their loved ones should they die (suddenly or otherwise).

Nelie