The time scale you use makes all the difference as to whether you view yourself as a ripple passing through I think. Ultimately, we all are just ripples. But you also never know how you affect the future indirectly. I bet those grandkids of yours, Tom, if they get old enough to keep a memory of you, will treasure it years later as adults. And wonder and want to know more about you. Right now, I'm reading a journal written by the great great Aunt I was named after--who went out to the trenches and entertained the troops with her husband in WWI. Her life overloapped with mine by less than a month. When I was born she was extremely ill with cancer but reportedly overjoyed that the first child of the next generation had been named after her. Thinking about her courage during the war and the independence she showed for a woman of her age has influenced me. Even though we never got to know each other in person.

Now, having said all that, I do know exactly what you're saying here and yes, I have thought about it though I know it would take a lot more of my thought if I got a recurrence. I don't want to spend all my retirement savings as well as money I don't have but someone else might have to repay on a treatment that might buy me a few weeks of low-quality life. There comes a time when I think I would rather make my peace with impending death and say "enough". When that time is is something I hope I will know when and if I get there (I could always get in an accident and have no time at all). I hope you will know it when it comes too.

Nelie