I am so sorry that you got bad news. And yes, the cancer warrior view can just add another layer of stress onto the patient. There is a time for that view but sometimes acceptance is healthier.

I really like the advice Gloria has given you based on her experience with her husband. One step at a time.

Great that your family has got together and you're sort of in this together. We are all behind you too. You sound like a terrific guy and if I was a praying type person I'd be praying hard out for you now!

1996, ovarian cancer surgery + cisplatin and taxol.
September, 2007, SCC of left lateral tongue. Excision.
October, 2009 recurrence in scar tissue, T1NOMO. Free flap surgery from left wrist - neck dissection. 63 year old New Zealander. No chemo, no RT.
February, 2014. New primary in left buccal mucosa. Marginal mandibulectomy, neck dissection, right arm free forearm flap. T1N0M0 but third occurrence and some areas of concern: RT started 8 April and finished 19 May.