Dear Aimlee:

I lost my best friend in the world on 10/22/11. She was 51 years old and died of liver cancer and other complications. She was the most amazing person with a huge heart and I miss her more than anyone could possibly imagine! I have a couple of Cindi stories to share with you!

She went into the hospital on Tuesday and for the most part was incoherent (not in a coma though) and I would sit with her and talk to her every day. She worked for an awesome company that sent people to clean the house and shampoo the carpet so that everything would be nice when she went home.

On Wednesday afternoon, I told her that I needed to leave for a while to meet the carpet cleaners and that I would be back. She opened her eyes, looked at me, reached out her arms and said "hold me". I put my arms around her, kissed and told her that I loved her and that I would be back.

At her house, there were papers and stuff by her chair that i picked up off the floor. On top was a purple (her favorite color) spiral notebook. Something told me to look inside. Cindi was not a journal type person but the first page was dated Good Friday 5 or 6 years ago. She talked about going to dinner with her dear friends and neighbors and then going to Good Friday services with the. She talked about how moving and beautiful the service was and that she wanted to go every year. She said when she came home she listened to her beloved Christian music. Rich Mullins (I think that's his name) was her favorite. She goes on about what a wonderful man he was and how much she admired him for his faith and what he believed in. She also said that she should have married him!! She was quite the character!! Anyway, I turn the page and read that her MOST favorite song by him was "Hold me Jesus". I got major chills and I knew that she was ready, that she hadn't been talking to me and that she wanted this song played at her service.

Her brother that she was closest to lives in Montana and got into town very early the morning that she died.He had a meeting to attend and so sadly he wasn't with her when she passed away.

On Saturday, I meet him at her house and we were looking for something that she wanted cremated with her. I looked in her nightstand and there on top was a piece of paper...she had handwritten Psalm 91....another sign. This is the prayer she wanted me to read.

Greg, her brother left the choice of music for her service up to me and I of course read Psalm 91 and Hold me Jesus was played.

She makes me laugh or cry everyday and I know she'll always be with me. And she continues to send me "signs". She had a huge heart and was the most amazing person I've ever known!

Your mom will always be with you! Maybe the signs won't be as apparent as the ones I get from Cindi, but you'll get them!!

I wish you peace.

Cathi