thank you Denise! I will check into those bags.

I have a strong network of friends who are stepping up to give me an outlet from the stress.

I hope my husband will realize all I do but right now, I'm totally invisible and he gives our daughter who has done 2 things for him all the credit of taking care of him. He's been emotionally/verbally abusive to me for years. This is going to be a hard journey for him. I have raised my kids and gotten along without him for 25 yrs now, he needs me. I don't need him. But I look at him as one of God's children and I will take care of him for this reason. Maybe...he will change. I'm not holding out for it but I will stand back and see what this horrible journey brings.

Spouse of 58 yr old with BOT cancer
Stage 4a HPV16 positive
3 chemo treatments cisplantin
35 radiation treatments 7000 cGy
former smoker/chewed tobacco for 38 yrs.
1/2020 diagnosed with cancer near TMJ
4/2020 chemo 5 days every 2 weeks
6/2020 proton therapy
9/21/2020 cancer free