Hi Sallie...hang in there. Keep moving forward--baby steps--one foot in front of the other. You two are almost finished with treatment. It may still be rough for a month or so, since recovery doesn't happen immediately when treatment ends. But, it will get start getting better steadily after the two week mark. I suggest encouraging husband to try to swallow whatever liquid he can tolerate in order to exercise his swallowing mechanism. It will make it a quicker and easier transition from the feeding tube when he's healed.

I think there are people (patients and caregivers) here who will say that being a caregiver is, in some ways, harder than being the patient. While a patient's main focus is eliminating cancer and focusing on recovery, a caregiver has all his or her regular responsibilties, coordinating appointments, additional responsibilities that the patient isn't able to handle, and the obvious stress of actually taking care of the patient. Add into the mix being worried, feeling guilty about enjoying food or even life, and the helplessness of not being able to make it better--stressful, you betcha. Been there. Don't be too tough on yourself for feeling it and reacting. There is a good reason a caregiver is considered a co-survivor when a patient becomes a survivor. Caregivers are not only part of the cancer care team but they are part of the unit that is receiving treatment. Your wellbeing is a part of it.

Well, Sallie, you have a great group of people who will be more than happy to talk to you about what you are going through. You can post questions on the forum, or you can connect through personal messages. If you would like to actually, "talk", that's doable. You can send a message and I'd be happy to arrange a time with you to chat.