Wendy, I could have written the same post. You are not alone. I too am tired of it all. We are not allowed to forget and go on with our lives because of the repeat appointments and what not. Just want you to know that you are no alone. I also want to let you know that I see a psychologist on a weekly basis and he is my lifeline. Someone I can vent to and he will give me the help and support I need to make it to the next week. I too put on this happy face when i go and do things around people.