Audrey,
I was freaked out when I thought that I had cancer and I was waiting over a weekend for my good friend/radiologist to get back with me with the result of a barium swallow he performed on me.(I think he avoided me all weekend on purpose.) Once I was diagnosed for sure on Monday, though, I lost my fear and became very calm about the whole thing. My mother was upset. My sister was upset. My girlfriend and my children were frightened, but I, for some reason was not. I am not sure that I am typical, but I suspect that a lot of folks felt as I did. Once you know for sure that this strange thing has actually happened to YOU...you realize that it might as well be you as the next guy...and you accept it, and do what it takes to begin the healing process. For sure it is surreal.
I think that most of us on this board who have been through this ordeal are very realistic about our situations, but not necesarily sad...life goes on.

Take care, learn everything that you can, and keep us posted.

Danny G.