Well today I recieved the official diagnosis which is Polymorphous Low-Grade Adenocarcinoma of the Palate. My OM recommends immediate treatment. I will be seen next by the OM specialists at Mass General a week from today.

The Pathology report is greek to me so it's still a wait see. I know I will have surgery. What I really want to know is if it is primary or secondary? Will I also need radiation or chemo treatments? What tests will I undergo? How soon will the surgery, treatment begin. I have begun listing questions. And I will talk to my daughter tonight. And who ever said I needed second/third set of ears is absolutely correct!

During today's appt I felt as though I were in a dream. Didn't seem real to be discussing me with 'cancer'. My husband was there but I wish he were not. I can't stop wanting to take care of his emotional needs! Then I get annoyed because this is about me and not how he feels. I keep telling him he has to be strong because I'm gonna need him to be whenever he comments on how this is affecting him. I know this is hard for both of us. I don't want to become bitter because of my fears. Ramble, ramble, ramble.... Sometimes I don't know what to think or feel. Don't like being out of control!!

To who ever reads this... thank you for listening.

Audrey