I would rather have a heartfelt kindness given to me by a stranger than one given to me by a friend or relative out of a sense of obligation or guilt. Some people are just not capable of coping with a crisis situation. And you cannot make someone feel what they cannot feel. They cannot give what they do not have to give. My son and I had a few of these. too. I would rather concentrate on the ones who were there for both of us and gave unselfishly of their time and efforts and compassion. The cancer experience brought new people into our lives and also showed us the depth of love and caring from the friends and relatives we already had. Some of the best we found right here at OCF.