It is hurtful when friends and family are standoff-ish. I sent out email updates during my husband's therapy, and never understood why some of my in-laws never bothered to reply at all. However, I have learned that others on the list were glad of the updates but literally had no clue how to respond. Others were terrified by the updates aa it meant facing their own mortality.
All the best to you and your finance during this difficult time.
Maria