Jack,
Don't give up. We are all here for you. I still felt pretty crappy when I was 5 weeks out of treatment, but I am still here. I didn't have my PEG tube out until almost three months after my treatments ended, and I had the fun of trying to dress for work wearing the damn thing! It is so sad about your fiance, particulary after what the two of you have been through. This disease does suck, and it takes a toll on our caretakers, too. My husband ended up having heart problems about six months after my treatments, and I'm pretty sure that my cancer contributed to them. We are both hanging in there, though. Keep the faith!

Female, nonsmoker, 70, diag. 5/09 after tongue biopsy: stage IV. Left hemi-gloss. and left selec. neck disec. 30 lymph nodes removed May 20. Over 7 weeks daily rads. with three chemo. PEG removed 12/4/09 Am eating mostly soft foods. Back to work 11/09 Retired 4/1/11. 7 clear scans! Port out 9/11. 2/13. It's back: base of tongue, very invasive
surgery involving lifestyle changes. 2/14: Now speaking w/Passey-Muir valve. Considering a swallow study. Grateful to be alive.