Wanda

John's concern about getting HPV now strikes me as locking the barn door after the horse have bolted. But you have to deal with the husband you got, so next time you get a Pap smear, request that the doctor also order an HPV test on the smear cells. According to the Digene HPV test info site: [quote]The digene HPV Test can be done by any laboratory, usually using the same sample of cervical cells collected for the Pap. It does not require any additional time or discomfort on your part.[/quote] HPV test info My understanding is that there is no similar test for men, our HPV is diagnosed from the tumor.
When the tests results come back negative for HPV for you, then get a copy and give it to John.

If John still refuses to be reasonable, then you have two other potential avenues:
Buy a good vibrator - the best one for women is undoubtedly the Hitachi Magic Wand (my opinion is based on over twenty years of field research and backed up by every major porno video on the internet as well as sex forums) You can even help out OCF by buying it on Amazon thru the OCF link. Explain to John that his cancer fears has forced you to a mechanical substitute - sort of like using the PEG when your throat muscles don't work. Incorporate it into your lovemaking.
Or follow the adage: What is good for the goose is good for the gander and let John do without oral sex until he reciprocates.
My advice is to do all three. BTW, my wife had abnormal pap smears all the time and her HPV tests came back negative. I believe I got my HPV from one or more of the lovers I had before I met my wife. Odds are the same is true for John, but once an irrational fear takes hold, I think you will need the cold hard test paper fact that you do not have HPV to bring him back to reality. Since John apparently believes his HPV has magically disappeared, then he should have no basis to disbelieve your test results.
Keep the Faith
Charm