Down with Downers, I say. Sometimes it can be difficult to prepare for them ahead of time in order to have a snappy comeback. The worst I heard was when my son was recovering between surgery and radiation. We were at the SS office, where he was applying for Disability. He was out of a job, no health insurance, in the middle of divorce and the lady at the SS office had been interviewing both of us for hours already. Paul was sitting there, weak, tired, with drainage tubes hanging down both sides of his neck and we were both wishing for the torture to end, when the interviewer lady looked at Paul and then turned to me and asked, "Is his condition terminal?" I was completely shocked at her insensitivity. But I guess we showed her! He's cancer free now, got a great job, super sweet new lady in his life and doing fine almost five years later. Needless to say, that SS lady is not on my list of favorite people.