Donna, I'm so glad your mum won against the beast. Mentally it can take so much away from you, even as a carer. I hate to think what it is like for the patient. I'm glad your mum owned her life. To me that's what I've learnt from this. We are about to move 2200km away from our family next week. This is all so we can reclaim our life and own it. Don't know if it's the right thing to do but will never know if we don't give it a try. This is where we lived before Steve got sick. Steve needs to be confident and independant again. I know here where we are now, he won't be. But back in north queensland he feels alive and that's the best way to feel to be able to start to reclaim life. Most people that say things only ever say it out of love in our case and they don't realise the impact their words have I'm sure. Although some just don't understand and sadly they have never tried to understand. But what can you do. As long as I can filter what gets said we'll get by