Well, went today and met with the social worker instead (long story, but seems that the doctor thought she needed to find the best resource for us)and something wierd is happening- we will be working with three different people... Beverly (the social worker) to work with paperwork and social aspects to help us, a chaplin (her recommendation) for premarital counseling, and a psychiatrist to help us with the mental aspects of dealing with this cancer and a new phase in our lives. I feel so much better and today when we left, I actually felt better- because we talked... during dinner, when we came home and rested, and just snuggled. The counselor told Bill that I needed the hugging and closeness that we needed in a relationship, even if we did not have the other aspects- and he listened. I feel like I am getting Bill back!
Sorry I am running on and on- I just am so excited! I feel so happy and alive again- I needed to know that Bill still cared about me, not just the cancer only.