Like Virginia & dryfly1, my brother was not diagnosed right away. Over a period of about 18 months, his doctor kept prescribing antibiotics for his swollen lymph node. Finally, the doctor did a biopsy and when it came back positive, he sent my brother to a comprehensive cancer center. He was diagnosed with tongue cancer, stage IV. That was over 3 years ago. My brother is back to work and has been cancer free since he ended treatment. I mention this because the next several months will be tough for you all, but people do survive, even stage IV people.