So, I haven't posted for quite awhile and this will probably be a rambling mish mash of thoughts. My question: Does quality of life after cancer allow for arguing and placing expectations on someone? My husband is doing well physically. He went back to work for a little while on and off. But his desire, which I gave in to, was to stay at our other place which is near the beach. We got a little mobile home on rented property right before he was diagnosed. Long story short, now he has been staying there by himself for the last 4 months(with our 2 dogs)while I am at our other place and still working. I don't mind that on the surface. What I mind is that my job is extremely stressful but my husband never has any compassion for anything I am going through. It's always about him. I always try to be supportive of what he wants to do, sometimes with the thought in the back (or front) of my mind that he may someday have a recurrence. But then I start feeling resentful, then I feel guilty, then back to resentful, and so on. I really wouldn't mind if he at least showed that he cared about my life. He is only concerned for his own conveniences. He called me at work today - I couldn't talk because I had someone in the office at that moment - I said "call you back." He said "nevermind" and hung up. I called him back 10-15 times and he wouldn't answer. He emailed me "now you know why I will never call you at work again, unless it is an emergency." What he was calling me about was of no urgency whatsoever. He knows he can call me anytime, but I can't always talk. How far should a person have to go in catering to the whims of their spouse/family member/friend who has gone through the terrible ordeal of cancer, without expecting anything in return? What can I say to him instead of what I feel like saying, which is "okay, you're fine now, quit acting like a prima donna and start showing some concern for someone else for a change - it's not all about you now!" I realize this goes beyond the issue of him having had cancer - I guess I just want someone to tell me it's okay to not feel guilty when I get angry with him, because I'm afraid he might have a recurrance and die, and then I will feel bad for those times I argued with him. I don't want to argue, but he is so frustrating and unreasonable! :rolleyes: So back to my question - Does quality of life after cancer allow for arguing and placing expectations on someone?