Petey - I ditto everything above. If you think giving up and dying is going to prove something to your family, the only thing it will prove is that you gave up when you could have taken charge and made a change for the better! Besides, if you start taking the suggestions offered above and start DOING something instead of waiting around for the pity party to start, you will feel much more in control of your life and you will be too busy to get down and depressed. So get moving. DO IT!!