For you folks that are long term survivors, do you ever get back to anything near normal again? The thing that rocked me, probably more than anything else, is the utter feeling of vulnerability, and the idea that that vulnerability will ride with me forever. I'm terrified of the idea of recurrence, and I can't see that ever fading. It's literally like the boogieman actually came out of the closet; how do you sleep at night after that?