[quote]Guess I missed the noble cancer warrior pose at yoga, people. Cuz I am one surly woman right now. [/quote]

It's not just the survivors who become intolerant/combatative/surly

Whilst I regularly described Alex as a tantrum throwing 2 year old on this forum, for my part, I was at least as bad if not worse. I went toe to toe with the thoracic registrar looking after Alex's lung collapse when he suggested a 4th do over of the same procedure that had already failed the previous 3 times, nailed the RO to the wall when he suggested that Alex "wasn't trying hard enough" and smacked (figuratively) the bureaucrats who hid behind illogical and inflexible "policies" for sickness benefits. Alex DID eventually receive the attention of the head of the cardiothoracic department, get the RO consult returned to his case, and get sickness benefits backdated to the date he was diagnosed.

Do I care that I ruined so many people's day? Not if they were saying or doing stupid things. I feel slightly guilty about the people who did understand but could not do anything about it though...

I have heard from many people that once one has faced a life changing experience, one's perspective changes and one becomes more tolerant as the priorities shift. 3 years later, still waiting ...

HOWEVER, Alex and I are a stronger couple for the experience, our social network has shrunk to two (our choice) and we both do what WE want to do and everyone else be dammed. We are polite about it - but that is the way it is. Alex, despite all his ongoing issues (taste, swallow, weight, teeth), says that 2012 was his best year ever and 2013 will be even better!! He describes himself as content. I am not quite where he is (still have a massive amount of "righteous indignation" when I perceive an injustice - no matter who it is aimed at) but I do agree that our relationship is more solid than I could ever have imagined a relationship could be.

I don't think I will ever reach that stage where I might consider that cancer gave us any sort of "gift". I still find that type of remark mostly offensive. Whilst Alex and I might be stronger for the experience, I would still have preferred to skip the drama of 2010/2011 and remain the weakling I once was.

PS I have no sense of balance so yoga in any pose is totally wasted on me