I think everyone has such thoughts when times are tough, and Charm summed everything up nicely. I had a DNR, and did worse, when I was in the hospital for several months, paraylized, lost 110lbs in a few weeks, with no sign of recovery or hope, as a result of my first treatment, which thankfully was not needed. Actually, the hospital tied me to the bed for my own protection for a few days one time. Today, you would not even know what I went through unless I told you. Your wife made improvements, Medicine and technology is improving, and there is always hope, and ways to work around any disabilities, which may only be temporary. Maybe your wife needs professional help as a suggestion. Good luck with everything.