I have many friends I have made here that are on permanent PEG tubes. Their dysphagia and aspiration is bad enough where it is the only solution. One is employed full time as a code warrior/programmer, others are retired and traveling, one is Charm a regular here on the forum. The commonality in them all is that they have accepted that this is the nature of their future. For sure there are things missed, and there are compromises to live with. But all feel lucky to still be around, and all are leading happy lives with their significant others.

Said with great respect for others who have every right to choose their own path and live (or quit) in their own way and time, I don't understand her mindset. The path that she is on will end poorly as she is not going to get enough nutrition to stay healthy, or worse. I think that given this extreme choice, (again not desiring to offend) that she might be served well discussing this with professionals that deal with people with handicaps as a matter of routine.

For sure this is a handicap, and you can weigh that against people who have lost limbs, are wheelchair bound, are blind or whatever. I think that as long as your have your mind, your friends and family, you have a reason to find a way to endure and continue. I definitely think that there is still the opportunity to be a significant contributor to life and others. Counseling and intervention might realign the patient's perspective, if you could convince them to delve into that kind of interaction.

About 50 million Americans live with disabilities, 50% of them severe impairments. I like EricS's favorite saying, "He who has a "why" to live can bear with almost any "how"." -Nietzche

Brian, stage 4 oral cancer survivor. OCF Founder and Director. The first responsibility of a leader is to define reality. The last is to say thank you. In between, the leader is a servant.