Sue, you are going thru a period that will involve the rest of your life. I cheated on my wife and that was the biggest mistake I ever made. I never lied about it to her and even tho I had reasons to find comfort elsewhere, I wish I would have just used the upper brain more than the lower not thinking one. We are friends now and can finally talk, which she always wouldn't do before. We guys and yes you ladys have done the same and lived to regrte it. I hope you 2 work it out and can be happy again, not for your kids, but for the 2 of you. I just heard too many times. " if you have to, hurry up." I would get out of bed and take a ride to cool back down and gradually fell into the cheating game. Don't give up but try to forgive him. He must love you so help him in his quest to regain your love.