Do not worry about the "not eating" thing. You are not starving him. His body, in the end stages of life, would not use the nutrition even if if was provided. He does not want - nor does his body want - the feedings. Let that guilt trip go. Not using nutrition is just part of the body's way of shutting down.

I agree - try NOT to be in the room during these dressing changes. I know if I was the patient I would not want people there to see this. I would not want these memories to haunt my family. We all want to be remembered as the vibrant, laughing, purposeful humans that we have been.

Try to hang in there.

Donna