Tina,

Many people have provided a lot of information for you to digest about your mother's surgery. You can also find quite a bit on this website and in the forum. I just wanted to tell you that all you are experiencing and feeling right now is certainly justified under these dire circumstances. You have never lived one day in your life without your mother. Your mind should be racing right now with all the possiblities; your anger must rage; your heart must ache; your denail must prevail. Then, you need to accept your mother has a very bad type of cancer and with your help, she will battle this beast with all she has. Arm yourself with all the knowledge you can and turn everything into helping her find the best possible options available to tackle this battle ahead. There are many that have traveled the road ahead and we can all make the journey easier than if you had not found us.

I am sorry you have to feel such anguish and when I read your post I could still feel the pain I experienced when my mother was diagnosed with cancer in 1999. I remember the doctor telling me about the 40+ pounds of tumors they took out of my 95 pound mother (twice). What I learned after the second round would have helped her chances of surviving but I waited too long. You have a great advantage in that you have found the right place to learn all you can and be the best advocate for your mother's treatment.

Nobody asked for this. Your mother is so fortunate because you will be with her every step of the way. Your role will be much more difficult in many ways. Take deep breaths often, eat good, sleep well and take time for yourself as often as possible. Your life is turned upside down right now but a routine will establish itself soon. I am hoping for the best possible outcome for your mother and I know she feels your love every second of every day. Be sure and let her know because as a parent, even when we know, it just feels good to hear it, too.

Ed


SCC Stage IV, BOT, T2N2bM0
Cisplatin/5FU x 3, 40 days radiation
Diagnosis 07/21/03 tx completed 10/08/03
Post Radiation Lower Motor Neuron Syndrome 3/08.
Cervical Spinal Stenosis 01/11
Cervical Myelitis 09/12
Thoracic Paraplegia 10/12
Dysautonomia 11/12
Hospice care 09/12-01/13.
COPD 01/14
Intermittent CHF 6/15
Feeding tube NPO 03/16
VFI 12/2016
ORN 12/2017
Cardiac Event 06/2018
Bilateral VFI 01/2021
Thoracotomy Bilobectomy 01/2022
Bilateral VFI 05/2022
Total Laryngectomy 01/2023