My husband of 27 years (51 year old non-smoker, never used tobacco in any way) has been battling Stage IV, base of tongue squamous cell carecinoma since June 2005. He has undergone surgery to remove 32 lymph nodes (5 of which were malignant) then 40 treatments of Radiation therapy plus 1 round of chemo. His tumor grew so fast (more than doubled within 3 weeks of diagnosis) that instead of a PEG tube he ended up with a J-tube (into his small intestine instead of his stomach). His last radiation treatment was 9/21/05. Ken has been struggling with complications ever since he was diagnosed. We have managed day by day for the past 6 months and now I believe we are facing the worse challenge -- severe depression. Ken will not eat (everything tastes 'burned' or causes extreme nausea). He is hooked up to a feeding pump 22 out of 24 hours a day. We talk openly about his depression - but nothing seems to move him to accept help. His past experience with anti-depressants caused him to have tremendous suicidal thoughts - so he does not want to go that route. I am simply weary. I am stuck between whether I am a wife ... or soon to be a widow. Thanks for listening.