Seremom,
the first thing to jump out at me from your post was .."he is hooked up to a pump 22 to 24 hrs a day". Shoot that would depress me too!
Pete was fed during the night time hours with a port in his chest. Does he have a port? Much easier for all.
Pete managed without anti-depressants but , I did not! I used Zoloft for around 9 months and thank God for them.
As you can see by the replies you have received, depression is a common side effect for patients and caregivers. I know you are physically and mentally whipped right now and can promise a light at the end of that tunnel . If I were you I would be having discussions with his Doc`s concerning methods of feeding and different types of meds for the depression.
Take Care
Marica