sll,
I so understand what you said about there has to be an easier way! I often feel that I should be able to deal with all this - especially the eating part - in a "sensible" way, that there has to be a way I could eat 2000 calories a day without too much trouble, even if I do feel sick and my throat hurts and there does not seem to be a hole the size of a pin in my swollen throat. And the doctors saying I am doing fine, when I feel like crap!!!!
Only thing worse would be having to watch somebody I love go through this, and that's what you are doing.
Do you get a chance to take time for yourself? You have to take care of your own sanity. Try not to feel guilty. I watched my husband go through heart bypass surgery, and he drove me crazy!!! Sometimes I just had to walk out on him - and yes, I felt guilty about it, but now I understand that I was helping him by keeping myself healthy.
Good luck,
Leena