Hello Wendy,

In 2006 my mother died of a massive stroke. I live 20,000 miles away. I remember the pain and agony of traveling in the plane. Literally slapping myself when I fell asleep thinking that God would not listen to my prayers if I slept. I lost my boarding pass and even could not check in myself at certain stop. I begged the lady at the check in counter sobbing, "I used to be able to think well but my mother had brain surgery and I can't think at all." She had her stroke Jan 11 and I arrived just in time for her to pass away. I was severely depressed and became withdrawn and anti social until 1 day my daughter saw me in the kitchen and said "Mom you are so unfair and selfish. You want to die now? Think of us too". That was a big blow on me. From that point I asked for help I went to bereavement meetings, saw a psychologist and took Zoloft.

I am telling my story because sometime we are stubborn and think we can handle everything. We want to be strong but we are not. We need to learn to ask help if we can't handle it.

I feel that OFC forum is a venue for me to reach out to others and at the same time all of you help me to heal and go through my mother-in-law's illness.

We don't know each other personally but there is a special bond between all of us. Stay strong Wendy don't be afraid and ask help. God bless always. Ina