thanks. I am also having a lot of trouble with it and not sure which is the best way for men. i.e. ignore the emotion and just pretend I am ok or accept the weakness. I think this is a lot tougher for men due to their psychological build, social conditioning. A part of me is fairly angry about not being able to just handle it myself without help of others and pissed off that I am weak or whining. I would probably much prefer to be independant and self sufficient and maybe want the help of others vs. need it. This still happens when I have to struggle to ask for help or reach out. I may think that I am allowing myself to stay depressed by not fighting and it's my fault.

I post here, but I did not tell anyone about OC during treatment and still don't tell most people. I would not mention depression; mostly I'd say I am tired, miserable, have fatigue or something like that.
I may even try to pretend I am normal on an occasional good day; this of course will make me stressed and immunity will go down. This last time I've been sick for 2 weeks. It's useful to have a place like this forum and I appreciate the kind words and support.



[quote=Pandora99]Be proud of yourself for posting about the emotional side of cancer. I am thrilled that you are dealing with it openly and are working hard to find the right balance of medication and therapy. Far far too many men don't seek help when they should - with horrible results.

KNOW that your feelings are not unusual. I have a brother in law who had kidney cancer 10 years ago and he tells me now that without DENIAL he never would have made it through. How does that go "Denial is more than a river in Egypt". We all deal with it differently. No right or wrong way.

One day at a time, on foot in front of the other. Take care of youself first - and only if/when you feel you are ready - then you can think about new relationships in your life.

Take care.

Donna [/quote]