Most of us have had some emotional issues as part of our experience in all this. I would venture to say that anyone who comes close to death, and perhaps for the first time truly believing that they will not be around forever, are profoundly changed by the reality of this simple truth. Many people, even into the late years of their life view death as a very abstract thing, something that always happens to someone else.

For others it is not death itself, but the potential for physical suffering that distresses them. And yet others it is the inability to accept that we may be physically less than we were before in many ways - altering our ability to be self sufficient, work, speak, eat normally, not be stared at by others for our differences.

Whatever the reasons for our fears, there is no shame in needing support, both from friends, family (even a cyber one as here on the boards), or from the chemical aids that we might be prescribed to control anxiety or depression. But for many, particularly men (we can pride ourselves in our ability to tolerate it all, to tough it out, to be stoic through bad times), these are hard realities to embrace. They take time to sort through and come to terms with. Shared experiences whether in a supportive group like this, or in a foxhole when the storm is coming, break down some of the barriers to dealing with that lot which we find ourselves in. Should you convince him to come here, others may give him hope.... that they have danced with the devil and are still around a decade later, that life is again rich, that while they never go away completely, the fears become controllable and manageable.