Hi Markus I am truly sorry if I mislead you I know it is not an elective surgery but all I guess I was trying to express is that like everyone else I don't want to do it but I do most emphatically do know where it will lead. I am also going back and forth wanting the surgery quicker and back to thinking waiting for it will be fine too. I think I was just relating that although he is a big support he is thinking of me cause right now it is not visible my illness outwardly. And he is my main support and he has told me up front that should the tables be turned he would not have surgery and let things take their course. In his mind if it is too hard don't do it. This leaves me having to be careful of what I say in terms of not wanting to do this. When I am sure that this is what I want he is behind me one hundred and fifty percent. Unfortunately, I have period of weaknesses where I just try to wish it away or deny it. On the other hand there is my daughter and she has stated firmly that if this is what it takes to keep me here then there is no choice in her mind. God bless her!! There are so many arrangements to make and set up and I am working on my game plan every day something pops in my mind and I have decided to start a book to document everything I want to know as I am reading and learning. Presently on all kinds of little papers all around my computer ...this weekend my goal is to get a bit organized in that matter gather all the little pieces and put them together in question form. I have got some really great ideas and information from some connections made on this site and I am very grateful...but I still need know if there is Canadian link to this site as proceedures may be a bit different here. What concerned me a little was that my pharmacist has had no experience dealing with this surgery but is more than willing to work with me in every way he can and I am sure doing his own research as well.
Thanks again
Dianne
PS Day three smoke free