Liz,

I am saddened for you, and for Paul and the rest of the family. It's so hard to understand what goes through someones mind in situations like this, and especially hard when so many here have fought tooth and nail to survive the Beast. As I said before, draw on the massive reserves of inner strength, peace and acceptance that grew within you during Robin's struggle. You WILL come through this, and you will be O.K.
Wayne