Thank you all again.

I've read alot today and am totally exhausted mentally. I feel so pathetic right now. I've always been a tuff cookie.

Hell, I made it through 2 divorces. I have no one to stand by me through this. I have family, but we were never close.

My 2nd ex has remarried and we all get along. He wants to be my support system but I don't feel comfortable with that seeing he is remarried. Been divorced 7 yrs., but remained friends. Made a better friend than a husband smile

I fear the bonding that may take place because of me being so vulnerable right now.

I have always held a special place in my heart for him, still love him when I divorced him, but had to. Too many affairs.

I haven't felt this pathetic in years. Really am sorry about the whinning...this is not my norm. If my friends could see me know, they'd never believe it was me talking.

Age 55, Right side throat with ear pain. Squamous cell carcinoma of the supraglottis with cervical neck metastasis. Stage IV disease with a T3, N2, MX

March 2008, diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins Folicular Lymphoma

Now taking Thyroid pills for side effects of Rad Treatments

And Life Goes On...