I try not to let my worry consume me day in and day out. I'm trying to enjoy decorating the house for the holidays and finding things to side track the thoughts and worry I have. It's really hard though. It's like the fake smile you mention. Somehow you pretend to be happy but the hidden truth is I'm worried as heck of what's going to be the next blow of bad news .

Hopefully with the scan that's being taken this week it will show some good news and then my worries will lighten up .

Happy Holidays
Heidi