Jessica,

it's OK to complain on here, it's what we are for! Pain is the enemy at this point so be sure to work with your medical team to keep this under control.

I remember the feeling actually of thinking "How the hell am I going to get through this" and in the end I had to just put my head down and drive on through. That's not to say that I did it by myself, I'm thankful that I had family and friends that picked me up and carried me (literally) when I didn't feel I had the strength to go on. Rely on others to help you, physically, mentally, and emotionally. These forums did that for me in recovery after the mandiblectomy when I was stuck in bed on a sh!t load of opiates. I often wonder how much easier I would've had it had I found these forums before treatment and surgery, sadly I found them 11 months after being diagnosed.

Hang in there my friend and just take it one step at a time and focus only on what you have to do next.

Keep the faith as my dear friend would say.

Eric