I'm only beginning my treatment and I already feel beat. The chemo made me very sick and I'm depressed three days later. Meanwhile radiation continues and there is no chance to breath. I'm already loosing my voice. I worked for one hour today snaking a drain, I'm a plumber, and I almost passed out. I feel helpless because I will not be able to support my family the next 4-6 months. My work is very physical and I'm already weak. The hard part is everybody tells me I'm one of the strongest people they have ever known but I don't feel that way. I wish I could cry but I don't know how. I feel like a big baby for even putting these feelings into words.