Hello my name is John. I'm a 25 year old preschool teacher who has just been recently diagnosed with stage 1 oral cancer. It started as what I assumed was a really stubborn canker sore since I'm predisposed to them. Well after 3 months and no improvement I went to a dentist who took one look at it and had me imidiately go for a biopsy that day. I waited for 5 days and got the results back. I had well diffirenciated tongue cancer. 4 days after that I went into surgery and had part of my tongue removed and some of my lymph nodes removed on that side.

It's been 4 days since my surgery and I'm being overwhelmed with so many questions and the desperate need to talk to people who have gone or are going through this.

My major question is how long before the swelling goes down? And a ball bark healing time. They caught it so quick they didn't need to remove a large portion of my tongue so I didnt need any skin grafts.
Thank you for reading my post and I look forward to hearing from you guys

Hi John, our cases seem similar. I just completed 30 yo and was 29 when diagnosed. I am stage I like you, didnt needend to have anything on my tongue replaced.

My tongue surgery was on december 07, and 2 weeks later i had 57 lymphonodes removed. All came back clean.

I am also really anxious, but my life is almost back to normal. I mean almost because since i had primmary closure my speech is understandable but not as before.

My main issue right now is the afraid of reccurence, this is driving me mad.

Are you using any tube to eat? I got my removed one week later and started eating solids 20 days after surgery. Swelling is decreasing but i still have some hard parts on the tongue.

My neck is healing but not painfull... How many nodes you got off? Hope you get well asap! Its HARD to be into this so young!

Hi John:
Welcome to the Forum, although I hate you had to be here. I don't know anything about tongue cancer, but you will be hearing from many on this Forum soon when they read your post. It sounds like you are one of the lucky ones who had their cancer caught early and won't have to go through the radiaton/chemo series most of us had. That is a blessing. You take care, and others will write soon.
julieann

John,
How many lymph nodes out? I am assuming you had a CT scan at least. Were the lymph nodes taken out because it looked like one was diseased?

As to swelling . . . variable. Without radiation it will still take you some months for it to be close to normal. Be sure you do the exercises they will tell you to do.

It would be handy if you would make a signature to let us know what your situation is. Hopefully your surgery will take care of everything!

Best to you,
Anne

John, Welcome to OCF, glad you found us my friend, sorry you had to.

You are very fortunate that it was caught early, count your blessings there. Survival and recovery are more favorable the lower the stage, as you're a young man you should bounce back quickly.

These forums are amazing for connecting with other survivors and caregivers who are familiar with the path you've found yourself on. It is very common for your mind to race with questions and concerns so don't hesitate to voice them as chances are someone has the answers or can relate.

I know for me being diagnosed at a young age of 33, the realization that I had cancer and could die did a number on me emotionally as I was still under the impression I was Superman and would live forever. (I actually "hate" Superman as I think he's such a cliche superhero and identify more with say a Wolverine or Deadpool but that's the geek in me speaking)

Be well, again welcome to our little oasis on the net.

Eric

[quote=braziliangirl82]Hi John, our cases seem similar. I just completed 30 yo and was 29 when diagnosed. I am stage I like you, didnt needend to have anything on my tongue replaced.

My tongue surgery was on december 07, and 2 weeks later i had 57 lymphonodes removed. All came back clean.

I am also really anxious, but my life is almost back to normal. I mean almost because since i had primmary closure my speech is understandable but not as before.

My main issue right now is the afraid of reccurence, this is driving me mad.

Are you using any tube to eat? I got my removed one week later and started eating solids 20 days after surgery. Swelling is decreasing but i still have some hard parts on the tongue.

My neck is healing but not painfull... How many nodes you got off? Hope you get well asap! Its HARD to be into this so young! [/quote]
Thank you for replying to me. You have no idea the comfort there is in hearing from just one person. I had a few lymph nodes removed and frozen to see if they were affected and they came back clear. I didn't have a feeding tube. I've been eating semi solid foods like applesauce and soup. I can talk kind of clearly but my tongue is still somewhat swollen.
I just kind of feel trapped in my own body right now and very depressed. I'm having these outbursts of tears for almost no reason and I'm just all around scared. Scared that I won't be able to eat normally again scared that my job won't be held. But I'm trying to stay positive. This was all just such a whirlwind. I went from having cancer to having a biopsy to having it removed and my lymph nodes removed in the span of 3 weeks. And I'm so totally upset that the hospital gave me and my family so little information on healing

[quote=AnneO]John,
How many lymph nodes out? I am assuming you had a CT scan at least. Were the lymph nodes taken out because it looked like one was diseased?

As to swelling . . . variable. Without radiation it will still take you some months for it to be close to normal. Be sure you do the exercises they will tell you to do.

It would be handy if you would make a signature to let us know what your situation is. Hopefully your surgery will take care of everything!

Best to you,
Anne [/quote]

They removed some as a precaution and froze some to see if cancer would grow and it came back negative. I can currently talk a bit and think I'll be able to talk normally once the swelling goes down. The most amount of pain I'm currently experiencing is coming from the tip of my tongue. A nurse told me around a week and the swelling would go down. I'd like to be able to manipulate food without pain

John,

Cancer is a scary thing. The word alone is enough to make your blood run cold, being diagnosed with it is literally a life changing thing. It is OK to be afraid, it's OK to be emotional and depressed...very common reactions to this experience.

Dr's are typically very short on information for many reasons and to those that want more information it usually feels like you have to threaten their lives to get anything out of them. That's where these forums come in. This site and these forums are a wealth of information and experience and we're here to help you through. Not just the physical recovery but the mental and emotional as well. Often times those are the hardest aspects anyways.

Here's the thing, really it looks good for you. You didn't have to be subjected to radiation or chemo (which sucks) and your surgery didn't seem to be very invasive and as soon as your swelling comes down you'll bounce back. You have so many things going your way...rejoice in that.

I was on the opposite of the spectrum, I had a late stage diagnosis. I had to go through radiation/chemo and several surgeries. I lost half my face, my ability to eat most foods and speak clearly. I lost my job and the life I lead before cancer. You know what? I'm alive and I'm loving life more now then ever before even through these changes. What I'm trying to say John, is that life is good even if you have to find another job, or go through some financial struggle. I've drawn strength and hope from the others on these forums who've gone through more then I and have found my footing again because of their example.

We're here for you my friend. You'll get through this.

Eric

John,

I had the same surgery as you and 14 lymph nodes taken out. The swelling will go down within a couple of weeks. You'll be able to eat normal in a week or so. I had a tingling through my tongue I asked my surgeon he told me it's healing. I was on pain pills for 2 weeks then switched over to tylenol over the counter.
My lymph nodes were taken also as a precaution and I'm glad I did it. You'll be talking just fine in a couple of weeks. Certain foods I couldn't eat for a while, mash potatoes were gross and so was mac and cheese, it' fine now. Spicy food was a no no for a while too, but they are fine now.

One problem I do have is scar tissue where they took out the tumor in my tongue. Now that kinda interfers with my speech, but being a fast talker I have to learn to slow down my speech. When I talk slowly my speech is fine. Talking fast the sentences run together.

Hang in there you'll be fine in a couple of weeks.

Take care,
Connie

[quote=EricS]John,

Cancer is a scary thing. The word alone is enough to make your blood run cold, being diagnosed with it is literally a life changing thing. It is OK to be afraid, it's OK to be emotional and depressed...very common reactions to this experience.

Dr's are typically very short on information for many reasons and to those that want more information it usually feels like you have to threaten their lives to get anything out of them. That's where these forums come in. This site and these forums are a wealth of information and experience and we're here to help you through. Not just the physical recovery but the mental and emotional as well. Often times those are the hardest aspects anyways.

Here's the thing, really it looks good for you. You didn't have to be subjected to radiation or chemo (which sucks) and your surgery didn't seem to be very invasive and as soon as your swelling comes down you'll bounce back. You have so many things going your way...rejoice in that.

I was on the opposite of the spectrum, I had a late stage diagnosis. I had to go through radiation/chemo and several surgeries. I lost half my face, my ability to eat most foods and speak clearly. I lost my job and the life I lead before cancer. You know what? I'm alive and I'm loving life more now then ever before even through these changes. What I'm trying to say John, is that life is good even if you have to find another job, or go through some financial struggle. I've drawn strength and hope from the others on these forums who've gone through more then I and have found my footing again because of their example.

We're here for you my friend. You'll get through this.

Eric [/quote]
Thank you so much for sharing your story with me. It gives me a lot of hope. It's just completely unnerving that all this could happen and what the price tag has been. I can't even describe what part of this is the worst. I wake up some mornings and can't stop crying. And I don't always know why. But god be with you and again thank you for sharing a spark of hope with me.

[quote=ConnieFL]John,

I had the same surgery as you and 14 lymph nodes taken out. The swelling will go down within a couple of weeks. You'll be able to eat normal in a week or so. I had a tingling through my tongue I asked my surgeon he told me it's healing. I was on pain pills for 2 weeks then switched over to tylenol over the counter.
My lymph nodes were taken also as a precaution and I'm glad I did it. You'll be talking just fine in a couple of weeks. Certain foods I couldn't eat for a while, mash potatoes were gross and so was mac and cheese, it' fine now. Spicy food was a no no for a while too, but they are fine now.

One problem I do have is scar tissue where they took out the tumor in my tongue. Now that kinda interfers with my speech, but being a fast talker I have to learn to slow down my speech. When I talk slowly my speech is fine. Talking fast the sentences run together.

Hang in there you'll be fine in a couple of weeks.

Take care,
Connie [/quote]
Thank you. I feel like this information has put the air back in my lungs

Eric, i admire you so much. Even im diagnosed in early stage i just can feel like this yet. I cry lots os times. I feel spoiled, but i just dint wanted to be into this, with 29 years and on the top of my carreer. Meetings, speechs were my main activity. As time goes i cant find anyone that is a long term survival, more than 30, 40 years without any recurrence. All i read is reccurence, reccurente and stage changing.

This people stop posting here or... ?

John, i was eating everything, slowly exactly 24 days after surgery.

[quote=braziliangirl82]John, i was eating everything, slowly exactly 24 days after surgery. [/quote] I can eat but not much. It hurts too much to move the food around. I'm hoping this will subside in a week or so. So far I've been able to eat soup and applesauce and jello.

Anyway you are lucky! I was with a tube for a week, after liquids and after normal life.

braziliangirl82,
you wrote "This people stop posting here or... ?"

Yes, sometimes they stop and move on with their lives, sometimes they can't post due to cancer or being hit by a truck. It is unnerving, especially if you are young and really shouldn't have to deal with this. But you, and John, will find your stride and your way of dealing with this. And if you have a little faith, and get help with the anxiety if needed, some joy is going to sneak back into your lives. It may be some beautiful clouds in the sky, or a flower, a friend's encouragement, or the help you are able to give to others. God bless you both.

I understand. But I still wanna meet someone T1N0M0 that never got chemo or rads that is living life without main worries. With no recurrence for 20 years! Where's this guys?
Because all blogs I read or the person dies in the end (and i cry a lot) or they are into recurrences! I really want my life and safety back! Maybe i sound crazy but im sure im not. Im just freaking and praying to be out of this, but I do will be posting here

My cancer started with my tongue as well, as you can see in my profile. Yes, it is frightening, but mine was stage IV and I am still here after 21/2 years. Of course, I worry about recurrance, too. But I try not to get too depressed about it, even though sometimes it's hard not to be. My husband and I were in an accident this summer-our car got hit by a fire truck, and we also made it through that. I still have issues with eating, but I am happy to be alive and was blessed last spring to meet my first grandchild. Life is very precious, and I am more aware of that every day. Good luck to you. We are all here for you.

[quote=zengalib]My cancer started with my tongue as well, as you can see in my profile. Yes, it is frightening, but mine was stage IV and I am still here after 21/2 years. Of course, I worry about recurrance, too. But I try not to get too depressed about it, even though sometimes it's hard not to be. My husband and I were in an accident this summer-our car got hit by a fire truck, and we also made it through that. I still have issues with eating, but I am happy to be alive and was blessed last spring to meet my first grandchild. Life is very precious, and I am more aware of that every day. Good luck to you. We are all here for you. [/quote] thank you for sharing your story with me. This forum and the people on it sharing their stories has calmed me down do much. It's amazing to me that this kind of cancer is much more common than people realize. Are you able to speak well? I'm afraid I'm not very knowledgeable about the different stages. I didn't really have time to learn anything. From the second it was seen by a dentist I was on a roller coaster ride until now where I'm recovering from surgery.

John, adding my welcome and support. I know it's scary. But you've got a whole pile of people here who are rooting for you and thinking about you, sending the positive thoughts!

My cancer was a bit different from yours so I'll let those more knowledgeable give you specific advice. But it sounds as though they caught it early and that your medical team is on top of it.

I would say though that having cancer is tough enough without pain and anxiety on top of it. If you're in pain, get painkillers. If you're feeling as though things are getting tough to handle, speak to your oncologist about anti-anxiety and/or depression medication.

And as you have time and energy, look around this site. The main page has links to tons of info. You'll learn all about staging in general and your specific problems.

And keep us posted. And ask us questions!

I'm glad you're alive. You're going to be for a long, long time.

Courage.

My speech is pretty good, for the most part. When I am tired or have been talking more than usual, it gets worse. Nobody really has any trouble understanding me. Yes, oral cancer is more common than people realize. After I was diganosed i found two people just in my community that either had or have it. The woman that manages our coffee shop had it over ten years ago, on her tongue and had no chemo or radiation, and she does great, and looks fantastic. They really moved fast with me, too. I really didn't have time to think about it or have time to cry or get depressed...that came when I was finishing up my treatments. I didn't find this site until I had finished my treatments and was back to work, but I wish that I had known about it when I was going through all of it. You are lucky in that you have discovered it this early in the game.

The wiman of the coffee shop Really made ne happy right now!

Brazilliangirl,
She is just beautiful, and you would never know that she ever had anything wrong with her. She was also very young when she was diagnosed, and had two small children, who are now in high school. She also never was a smoker or drinker. She was the first person I told about my cancer other than my close friends and family. The morning after I met with my surgeon I sat in the coffee shp and talked to her and she really put my mind at ease.

John, welcome to OCF! Glad you have found this wonderful resource to help you thru this. I know its not easy going thru surgery and the recovery. Within about 2 weeks you will have made big improvements.

You are so fortunate to have caught this at Stage I. Too many times oral cancer is not found until its in the late stages. You are also young which means you will heal faster than someone older. It wont be overnight but hopefully in another week or 2 you will be back to eating almost normally again. Consider yourself very lucky being able to dodge chemo and radiation. They arent easy and have their own set of side and after effects. Your situation should enable you to bounce back and return to your life rather quickly.

Best wishes with your recovery!

[quote=David2]John, adding my welcome and support. I know it's scary. But you've got a whole pile of people here who are rooting for you and thinking about you, sending the positive thoughts!

My cancer was a bit different from yours so I'll let those more knowledgeable give you specific advice. But it sounds as though they caught it early and that your medical team is on top of it.

I would say though that having cancer is tough enough without pain and anxiety on top of it. If you're in pain, get painkillers. If you're feeling as though things are getting tough to handle, speak to your oncologist about anti-anxiety and/or depression medication.

And as you have time and energy, look around this site. The main page has links to tons of info. You'll learn all about staging in general and your specific problems.

And keep us posted. And ask us questions!

I'm glad you're alive. You're going to be for a long, long time.

Courage. [/quote]. Thank you so much. That truly touches my heart. I haven't been in that much pain and because I have a weak stomach and don't want to know what it would feel like to vomit with all this going on I avoided taking the pain pills. The morphine made me really naseaus and it took every ounce of self control I had not to vomit.

I do have a few questions. I was advised not to brush my teeth but not for how long. I have a check up on Wednesday so hopefully I can resume it then.
And do you or anyone else know how bad it hurts to have surgical staples removed?

Hi John, i cant help with the staples because i used the plastic surgery stiches. It wont be removed, it will be absorbed. Have u got a drain? If u do, i can tell its not painful.

John....I didn't have surgical staples my stitches disolved. I brushed my teeth using the swabs no toothbrush and brushing real soft until my stitches disolved on my tongue. It probably took 10 days. You can get the swabs at the drug store. I couldn't leave the hospital until the drain was taken out. My drain was taken out on the 2nd day and I was out the door.

Also use Biotene mouth wash and toothpaste. No mouth wash with alcohol ever.

You might want to try tylenol over the counter.

Did you go to a Cancer Center?

Hope this helps.

Connie

Hi there John, I was a stage 2 - one lymph node involved but only after they biopsied me. I had 40 removed 1/3 of my tongue excised and replaced - I have amazing mobility with my graft my plastics guy was fantastic. Staples? In your neck? I'm assuming. I was out of the hospital 10 days after surgery - and in Mexico 17 days after surgery - I could eat pretty much most food except dry and hard stuff and frankly I found mashed potatoes harder to eat than soft veggies fruit and omelettes if I remember correctly I was just getting back to normal 4 weeks out when they recommended radiation for me. That's when my tongue reall swelled. I used to put the food on my good side it made it easier to go down. Try rinsing with a mix of baking soda,salt and water I used to add a table spoon of each to a bottle (2 cups of water, this will help heal and clean out any junk that's stuck... I used the foamies to brush my teeth, until day 14 ten I used a soft tooth brush. I also love my water pick... On the low setting it cleans your mouth nicely - I add a bit of all natural, alcohol free mouthwash to freshen up.
Staples - I used to be a nurse - so I've been on both ends... I had invisible stitches in my neck - but my arm graft site was mighty ugly and had easily 50 staples. now something like this is very dependent on location, (more sensitive areas hurt more) and the individual, are you super sensitive to pain? Then it's gonna hurt, if your not it wont hurt much. I had mine removed prior to leaving the hospital, and the only one hat hurt was the one that was dug into a nerve. And to insult to injury they removed a patch of skin to cover my donor site (wrist) and used a thick pad to cover my wound... Which they were kind enough to STAPLE to my leg... That didn't hurt at allbut I was mildlys insulted that with all my injuries they would unnecessarily staple this pad to my leg...

Try not to worry and freak out. This is for both you and Brazilian girl. This is a small forum, we ave a lot of members but most are transient, they'll come and go once they're done with treatment. So it's not an accurate representation of survival rate. We do lose some people, But people die of heart disease, and liver failure daily. Cancer is scary, I admit - I had some seriously heart stopping moments since my diagnosis. However I got my treatment, I listened to my drs. When they recommended I go through with radiation and chemo, despite my dr who is great, saying he believes he got it all - not something I take lightly based on his credentials But I went whole hog and did everything I could to stop this disease in its tracks. I also adjusted my diet to help me heal and strengthen my immune system, I walked every say even though I felt horrible near the end. I asked questions, and did my own care - I now go to acupuncture and do lymphatic massage (this may help with the swelling too -John)
Will I have a recurrence? I have no idea, am I content in the knowledge I did everything I could to try and stop this disease...? Yes. So It is now in god's hands. I could face a recurrence, but I could also get hit by a bus, shot, or have a heart attack, so live your life now, do not be afraid to move forward, don't give into your fear of this disease, it's already stolen a lot from you, don't give it that much power. Its a part of your life, but not your whole life - if it is then it's won.
good luck, thee diligent, keep and eye out for anything unusual - swollen nodes, rashes on your neck, etc... Be active in your care. Learn what is normal for your mouth. Etc. and good luck, we're all here for you...

Hi, John.

It sounds like you have the best possible prognosis! I also had the same thing, but I still became very depressed shortly after surgery. It's a normal reaction that gets better, definitely seek out help from a psychiatrist/mental health counselor if you feel like you might need meds or one-to-one counseling. Even though I find great support on these forums, I still go once a month to a private counselor and it helps me. I was going more frequently in the beginning as soon as I was feeling well-enough to do so.

I'd say that my recovery took longer than the average, but I had a couple of things that complicated my case. Everyone is vastly different, but with many similarities. Like Eric said, you are young and did not require rads/chemo, so that will mean that your physical recovery will be much quicker. On the flip side, the emotional recovery is a longer process and an ongoing one for a cancer survivor. That's why we're all here!

With respect to the staple removal (I'm assuming you mean in your neck), it's not bad at all. It's quick and you'll most likely feel better in that area pretty quickly.

As far as brushing your teeth, I was given permission to do so while I was in the hospital, but was told not to brush my tongue. It may help to get a toddler toothbrush because it is smaller and softer so you can reach back to you molars without disrupting your tongue. I had a very difficult time clearing my mucous secretions and learning to spit again, so I had a home suction unit for about a month. I found it very helpful. I would also swish out my mouth just to help clear it out.

I developed what is called "white hairy tongue"...looks as gross as it sounds. Mine was white do to all of the smoothies and ensure I was drinking. Your tongue surface might look like a shag carpet for a while until you start to reintroduce some rougher textures back into your diet. It's harmless and mine went away slowly when I was finally able to brush my tongue and use a tongue scraper (don't do this without asking your doctor).

I hope some of this helped. Each day you will get a little better physically, but don't be surprised if emotionally you're on a roller coaster for a while. When we are diagnosed and treated so quickly, our heads spin! It's a lot to process in such a short time and I think it's harder to process for a younger person such as yourself because you most likely didn't expect to have oral cancer at your age.

I suspect that you will make a full recovery with respect to speech and eating, with time. You're already ahead of where I was at this point in your recovery. Best of luck to you and keep coming back.

Take care,
Kerri

Thank you again to everyone. I woke up today and didn't cry or panic. I kind of sat on my bed and tried some of the tongue exercises the speech therapist gave me. Then I decided since each day I'm speaking clearer and clearer I might as well try a more solid food. So, little by little I ate a piece of bread and who knew bread good be so delicious?!

Now I'm trying to work out a way I can shave most of my face without getting my neck incesion wet.

Wednesday I go for my pre-op visit. Hopefully my doctor will say radiation isn't needed or that it can be put off for a while so I can enjoy life as usual for a while.
My one wish is that because I'm doing so well so quickly I can go back to the kids I teach.

i don't know if it helps with your incision, but down the road i would recommend an electric shaver. my beard was very light after rad treatment, but losing nerves and feeling in my neck made shaving a chore. electric shaver really helped, and if i shave every day with it i look clean. it will pay for itself in 1 to 2 years because blades are so expensive.

I also have another question. Is it normal to have a sore or blister at the end of your tongue after surgery? I have one and it kind of feels like when I had braces and they would cut the tip of my tongue.

You will my friend!

[quote=braziliangirl82]You will my friend! [/quote]I will have blisters?

Morning John, now I hope you're not a Yankees fan, I married one and never hear the end of it. Not that being from Boston has anything to do with it.
I thought I was the only one who savored a morsel of fresh baked bread. After not eating for a week, it was better than... most anything, I still appreciate food in a new way.
On the shaving picked up an electric razor, worked well and the scar reduces pretty quick, I'm six weeks out and no longer self conscious, most people barely notice. Good luck with the visit, ask lots of questions...

I mean you will be back to your kids soon. But i had some blisters too

[quote=braziliangirl82]I mean you will be back to your kids soon. But i had some blisters too [/quote] so this is normal? I feel like there are a few of them just at the tip of my tongue. But I don't really see them. If it weren't for these I'd be talking a lot better

Today I'm headed out in public for the first time without a bandage covering it. I'm not too worried about being stared at. I spend most of my life being gawked at and having people say and do rude things to me because I am gay. At least now those people will actually have something to stare at. I'm still nervous though. My mom will be with me and the rest of my family. I feel like I'm becoming a burden to my family even though they haven't said or done anything to suggest that. But I will be brave. Does anyone suffer from PTSD? My sister in law said I was probably experiencing it. I wish it would go away

Many people suffer from depression and other ailments related to being a cancer survivor. Some seek out therapists or other doctors. Others have found success with taking anxiety meds.

Im sure you look worse in your mind than you actually do. We are all our own worst enemies, especially with our appearances. Most people are so involved with their on things that they wont give you a second glance. Go out there with your head held high. You are still the same person inside so no matter what the outside shows. Be proud of who you are and never let anyone ever try to make you feel less of a person for any reason.



PS... When you have time, please add a signature. Click on the "My Stuff" tab then click on "profile". Scroll to the bottom and type in the white box, click submit. Its a big help in getting to know you easier. Check out what others have and make your own history thread for your signature. Thanks!

Hi John - glad you're feeling better that's awesome!!! With regards to the radiation if they recommend it - it will likely be within six weeks of your operation. That generally means they're worried about cleaning up any errant cancer cells - I wouldn't put it off. Good luck with everything - you should read up about Aussie Dave - he was 18 at the time of diagnosis. He's handled it brilliantly - and he certainly had it bad - he puts everything into perspective have a great day. Hugs!

John, my guess is that the blisters are merely that and that they'll go away with time. I won't guess about how long because like everything else, healing is an individual thing.

As far as the shaving thing, yeah, an electric might be the way to go. I just plain didn't shave from a few days before my neck dissection until at least 6 months after RT. Wasn't worth the bother with all the numbness in my neck and cheek. Then I dutifully shaved for a year or so until I decided it was too much trouble. But I had a beard for many years in my 30s and 40s so it's a natural feel for me.

Hang in there buddy!

I was pretty self-conscious about my appearance, too. In fact, when my neck really got bad due to the radiation, I couldn't bring myself to even look in the mirror. Even now, I think that I look sort of lopsided, but everybody else thinks I look terrific. I was at the cancer center last week for a check-up and one of the people who had worked with me commented on how great I look. The worst thing was just a few weeks after I completed my treatments, I had to get my drivers licence renewed, so my picture on it is a constant reminder of how far I have come. If you just had surgery with no radiation or chemo, you will bounce back much faster.

Thanks for the advice guys. I know I say this a lot but it means the world to me. I went out today as planned and it felt exhilarating. I even had moments where I forgot about the incesion. It's funny (for lack of a better term) how when you're diagnosed with a possibly fatal disease like cancer how such simple things can give you a esteem boost. My mom took me to Denny's and although it took me a very long time to eat I found I could eat some normal things that I love. It just filled me with me so much hope and made me feel much less alone.
I did end up getting quite fatigued during our mall visit but I found a copy of the witches on DVD and me and my mom will hunker down and watch that later.
As for creating a signature I don't understand all of the info on yours and some of the info you do have I haven't been given yet

John, after my 57 nodes removed my smile got numb. but less than 2 months later it is almost normal.

I'm also constantly worried about whether or not I'm going to be able to go back to my job. I'm less than a month shy of being covered by the fmla act.

Hi John - it sounds like you are making good progress. My son also had a slight problem with his speech and he sounded like he was talking with a lisp but it was only a very short time before his speech returned to the way it was before. We went out to eat to places where he liked and could tolerate certain foods. Getting out to do even the simplest things is uplifting and good for you and your Mom, too!. I found that I really enjoyed just seeing my son eat and smile a little. Like you, he did get very tired and slept a LOT, so getting lots of rest is important. Don't worry about the scar. It gets very faint in time and hardly noticeable at all. About the abbreviations, if you go to the top of this page and click where it says "Forum" you will see a list of threads to the right. Just hit the "Abbreviations" and this will get you to a bunch of stuff on them. I also have a web page I made from most of the abbreviations found here and have put them in alphabetical order. If you want to check this out, just go to:

http://web.utk.edu/~aalix/abbreviations.html

Whenever you get ready to do your own signature line, here's what you do:
1) Go to top of this page, click on "My Stuff" and then "Profile"
2) Scroll all the way to the bottom where you see the Signature Box
3) Type in whatever you like
4) Click on Preview to check and see if you want to make changes
5) Hit Submit and "Voil�" That's it!!

John, at some point you will speak fine - I meant to say this to you way back but got caught up in other parts of your post. As I've said before I had a third of my tongue removed. Then I had 33 fry sessions (radiation) - I do film work part time - so I called my agent last week (it's been 1 year since surgery, and 9.5 mos since radiation finished) I listened to my message back after leaving it and was shocked to discover I had no lisp! I struggle with some letters sometimes but for the most part I speak clearly. I do get dry ocassionally so I need water at hand but other than thar i feel great - and very blessed!
Distraction (like going out with your mom) and focusing on other things will help alleviate the fear - give it time.
Also I'm not sure why they use staples for neck dissections when there are other options available, it's bizarre - if they just thought a little more - a person is already traumatized with a cancer diagnosis, then you chop them up, why the hell would you make it an even more traumatic recovery? Any good surgeon can do a hidden stitch, so why not use that? It makes it visually easier on a patient particularly if you have to split the jaw.
I've wondered that or a while - I do know it's probably faster for them but still....
Hoping you get good news and don't have to do rads... As for people staring let them - who cares - as you probably know the only opinions that matter are those of people who actually mean something to you. the rest can take a hike!! take care!

Thanks again everyone. I did end up getting an electric razor and thankfully it had a grooming end because after a week of not shaving my face was a hot mess. I had to use the buzzer part to trim down the hair and the actual electric razor. I could not believe the amount of dry skin that came off my face! I sadly couldn't shave by my incision so there is still a little hair by it and after getting rid of all my facial hair I noticed just how much tape residue is on my neck.
Went out yesterday for the whole day and it was invigorating! Although I did get pretty worn down. *** has anyone else noticed this -->*** and I noticed my tongue seemed to have gotten a little tired as well.

Tomorrow I go for my post-op appointment. Hoping for good news and to get the staples out of my neck. They are quite itchy.

Staples should come out soon they don't leave them in too long as it makes it more painful to remove them - though at this moment I imagine your neck is quite numb..... As for your fatigue it's normal - your body is recovering from a traumatic event - it takes a while. Try upping your protein intake it will help your healing. i'm a veg head so I use a good harmonized (soyless) vegan protein powder in a morning smoothie - but there are plenty of other ways to get extra protein. good luck today!

Thanks for the staples info. Has anyone else experienced blisters on their tongue after surgery? I have a tiny blister at the end of my tongue and if it would just go away I'd be talking fine. I'm just so worried that having blisters isn't normal. It reminds me of when I first had braces and cut the end of my tongue on them and could barely do anything. But I notice that after and while I'm eating.

I think it's very normal. I still get them ocassionally. It should heal soon. Take care

John please add a signature when you can. It makes it so much easier to respond to your questions without having to go way back and reread your posts. There are so many new people that it can be difficult to keep everyone straight (with my memory anyway LOL). It only takes 2 minutes. Look at other members signatures and make one of your own that will show your history.

Signature directions..... Click on the "My Stuff" tab then click on "profile". Scroll to the bottom and type in the white box, click submit. Thanks!

So I have an update. Went to my surgeon and had my staples removed. He noticed the incinsion was infected. He drained where the puss was, took a culture and put a pressure dressing where he drained it. Told me still no word on radiation but he thought they would watch me for a while, possibly a year and reevaluate. The staple removal was pretty painless. So I went on my way with the good news that next week I'd be able to go back to my kids.
So my mom and I went on with our day and we decided to end our day by eating at an itilian restaurant because I could now eat what I want to. This is where my good day changed to a nightmare.
I started eating the pizza I'd been craving and my mom looks over and says "watch out you're getting some on your shirt". Well it wasn't sauce. It was blood spewing out of my neck. Long story short I ended up in the hospital again and had a round of IV antibiotics and am now home, I won't even skim the surface of how horrible the hospital stay was and how horrible the journey was to get there.

I'm hoping this doesn't set me back and I can go see my kids next week. Please keep me in your prayers. Just when I thought I was starting to get it all back the rug was ripped right out from under me again.

Hopefully it was just from your infection, once it clears up you should be okay! it's great they're going to monitor you but definately keep an eye on your neck and get to know what's normal for your mouth - hugs! Try to RA and le yourself heal.

Whew! That was quite a day you had, John - Good thing your Mom was with you to get you to the hospital. Sorry your hospital experience was so difficult, but it's good you are back home and can get on with the healing process. Try to be patient with yourself and make sure your body has the time it needs to heal properly so that you can be in good shape when you get back to your kids. Pre-schoolers can be a very active bunch!

John - whew is right. A terrible experience and I'm sorry to read that you had to go through it. I hope you're feeling better now and that you're not having any pain. Who knew pizza could be so dangerous??

Pizza is always dangerous unless it's made with a multigrain crust and vegan cheese.., grin... Sorry had to... But my sentiments exactly - hope you're feeling better!

vegan cheese sounds dangerous...almost as dangerous as lentil loaf :P

Hey hey my lentil loaf is awesome ont be hating on the loaf or the vegan cheese!!!! If yer ver in LA try out a lace called Madeline's, or RFD - they will Change your mind vegan food! Heavy sigh... I miss them.

Hello friends. I have another update. I'm doing very well and will find out in a few moments if I can go back to work. I'm doing well dealing with everything that has happened minus some nightmares.
Although I am really upset. It would appear that because I'm healing quite well on the outside and am starting to get back to my normal life others around me are acting as though it's over and I should be over it too. Most people's sympathy has vanished and people around me are too ignorant to realize that this is only the beginning and that I still may face radiation. They also don't seem capable of understanding how much emotional healing I still have to tackle. It's funny how the world just keeps spinning and those who cared before and during surgery could give a crap less. Especially my boss who verbally attacked This morning about parts of my appearance that have to change according to dress code before I can come back to work, completely disregarding my health and how I am feeling.

Thats against the American's with Disabilities Act. Read up on it. Your employer must make reasonable accommodations for you since you are now considered to have a disability. Many employers only look to the bottom line without any concern to their staff. They worry more about numbers than the person. Dont worry about it, do the best you can.

John,
I know it is bad, but at least some of us, probably most, have experienced the same, to varying degrees. Anytime you have a serious illness, once your back to work, you are judged to be perfectly well, and they assume you are over it all, including the fear. Wrong, as we all know. It is good to be able to vent on this board, isn't it?

My principal last year at school was sooooo mean to me at the end of the year. Most of that was that he lost his job, and he could "pick" on a small woman (noticed that most of my life), especially one whose strength was sub-par. When he asked me to keep him in mind for substitute teacher jobs (for me), on the last day, I'm almost lost it, then just laughed at him. No comment necessary.

I have a principal this year who is very supportive and appreciates me. So, yes, your boss can make a great difference.

Hang in there, it will improve. Know that many have walked in your shoes, they just might not live close by!

Best,
Anne

Hi John

I know what you went through.. people that never been through or never have closed people who have to go through this are really considered as 'outsider clan' than us. Their mindset is closed. My partner went through the same thing after her radiation treatment and pronounced cleared back in November. People at work pushed her back to the max to work.. yada yada.. and thinking she is still the same person like before? Come on.. it totally changed once you are diagnosed!.. Emotional is something huge to deal with. We would never be the same again, but that's not what other people see.

U hang in there. Plug in Ipod when they start talking crap, all u care now is you still have a job, moving forward, been through life experience that will make u just tougher. Those crap people can just shut it .. they are fake...

Hang in there. Its all about you moving on now.. others can just go climb the coconut tree ...

Al

This is how we are trying to look at it; before you were diagnosed, when you heard someone had cancer, what was your response? Ours was kind of like "Oh, we are so sorry." You know? We felt bad for them and we prayed for them, but life DID go on for us.
Now, since going through it ourselves for 6 months and still trying to recover from radiation, we have way more empathy for those being diagnosed.
Not making excuses for those around you or those who also think our lives should be back to normal now, but I really don't think they GET it, ya' know?
That's why this site is such a blessing; we all get it.
So, what is the plan? Are you going back to work?
Kathy

John, wow.. Didn't realize there were still pockets or ignorance and indifference. I can assure you most places are not like that. In a similar situation as this is just my second week at work full time since the two surgeries.. People are wonderful. Just glad I survived and returned in one piece. You don't need these kind of issues, when you are back to 100% move to a different group.. Hang in there, just ignore the jerks.

Agree with MikeM... hang in there, when you are back to full throttle, move.. and prove to these jerks that hey you are still stuck in the hole while i moved !!!

Stay strong!

I went back to work yesterday. It was wonderful to see all the children I work with and see their reaction to me being back. My boss came up to me on the way out the door to ask me how I was and to half assed welcoming back. It felt good to be back and actually get to communicate with the parents. When this all started I had typed up a letter to in a professional manner to let the parents know what was going on and why I had to leave so suddenly and my boss refused to pass it out and I found out yesterday that she actually told some parents I was on vacation. I made sure to tell the parents exactly what happened and now she looks like a moron.
But the parents and my co-workers were very supportive.
I just happen to work in a field where being a male I'm constantly discriminated against and this is just another example. My boss can spew personal information about her pregnancy, including details about her morning sickness and how much she vomits but for some reason me having been operated on for cancer gets swept under the rug.
I know too that from now on its going to be a battle to go to all my doctors appointments for follow up care because she doesn't grasp that my bought with cancer isn't over. But she can leave early 3-4 times a week for her doctors appointments.


Thank you guys for all your support. On a more pleasant note my favorite band who are kind of local kind of not sent me a box of all their albums, all signed with a different message of encouragement and they sent me some other goodies as well. They have a show tomorrow night in my town and are dedicating a song to me so at least I have that to look forward to!

Hi John - How wonderful to have had such a nice welcome back to work! Especially from the children and their parents. Concentrate on all the positive people in your life. Hope everything keeps getting better and better for you!

That's fantastic... On the band! Try not to feel down cancer is scary to everyone most people are just happy - 1) it's not them - 2) you're fine so they can stop thinking about it. During my treatment and even after my diagnosis my sister in law mentioned my cancer a total of 3 times - she never once called even to see how I was doing or offer help (she did come by the hospital one day of the 10 I was in). In fact the day of my surgery (14 hrs) she asked my daughter to baby sit so she could go to a "ball" - I have no siblings - my mom is gone and at the time I was in the hospital my dad was in Europe for 3 mos! My inlaws - are great and so was my husband but even they are happy it's over with (at least in their eyes)
Most people don't get it.
As for your boss - union? You have one... I'm assuming - time off for illness and check ups should be built into your contract... And believe me I'm not a union peron per se - but it do know 2 things - school boards don't like principals with a lot of grievances - and the best way to shut someone like her down, is mention union.

Good luck - heal well!

Unfortunately there is no union for preschool teachers. I spoke with human resources and they are investigating. It's really disappointing that my boss had to go and act in this manner. It took all the excitement I had to go back to work and ruined it. And I can't shake it. Today I go in for a half day and I don't want to go. I just have so many emotions.

Wow. Sounds like your boss is really being a jerk. I was pretty lucky, because I was the boss, but my Board was very understanding and wonderful. (I was director of a small public library.). Isn't great, though, the way the kids and parents welcomed you! It's interesting that people, even though many of them are sympathetic and kind, don't understand the aftereffects of this horrible disease. They think, OK, you had surgery and treatments and now you should be all better. I know that I didn't know anything about oral cancer until I got it.
Hang in there, John, you can always vent here. We are all here for you!

Some of this is just getting over the trauma and the diagnosis... it's still very fresh. Whatever they do or don't do it doesn't matter... do what you have to do to recover. and be kind to yourself. you deserve it. take care and hugs.

Thank you guys for your support. Things just seem to be escalating with my boss. Because yesterday I was at work for half a day instead of just a few hours more parents wanted to catch up with me and boss seemed irritated and annoyed that I was sharing with them in a professional manner what actually happened and correcting her telling them I went on vacation. And yesterday she threw it in my face that I spoke to human resources so I informed her that apparently I need to call them again and see if I get any results from a second phone call.
Never in a million years did I ever think me having cancer and having major surgery to remove it would garner this kind of reaction from my boss.

Fight for your rights - I wouldn't be hurt at this point I'd be pissed!

Hi John,
I taught preschool for many years as well as operated a Home day care. If it is at all possible, remember your kiddos. They love you and need you and I'm sure are thrilled to have you back. Go in, do your thing, hand parents your phone number if they want to talk and just explain that it has been requested you don't speak of it on company time or on the premises. Your boss is going to be the one looking like a fool in the end. If HR knows she is giving you a hard time about going to appts, they will know that is harrasment and most likely she will be warned and possibly terminated if it continues. If there is no HR, call the Labor Board. I'm sure it will spark GREAT interest.
There is definitely SO much ignorance out there. Kevin has his first PET on the 12th and between me and all of you, because he doesn't read the forums much, I am nervous as heck. This constant yuck in my stomach and really, just on again off again crying fear. Fighting all of that and keeping it private because to all our families, we are done. He's back to work and life is normal. We all know the drill.
Anyway, we are here for you and feel for you. This person sounds as if she has some pretty serious insecurity issues and you are her target to give her power right now. DONT let her have that on you. Just smile and move on if possible! I know the preschool route though, and it can be pretty hard when there is tension in the air. The kids know..... Love them and play!!!!!!
Kathy

Thanks Kathy. Most of the parents think age is a lunatic now because she told them I was on vacation and the parents look like they've been slapped in the face when I tell them no, I was actually battling cancer. The kids are the only redeeming factor of my job and some of their reactions to my returning have touched my heart in a way I'll never forget.
I've learned from all of this, on some level, that my time here could be up at any moment and life is fragile and I just need to be thankful for each moment I'm given and do my best to make the most of those moments. My battle with cancer has stripped away a lot of those life pretensions that rule so many people's life and I can't give my boss the power to steal even a fraction of those moments.
Like last night- my favorite band had a show locally and played/dedicated a song just for me and they came over and talked to me about all I was going thru and shared their own experiences. These are the kind of moments my life needs to be centered on. And you guys are all right. I can't lend her any of those moments.

Good for you, John. Sounds like you are on the right track! People that try to give you grief are at all levels of teaching and they just dig themselves into a hole. I had one who was a problem for everyone in many different departments and the day she left (or was "encouraged" to) was widely celebrated. Teaching has so many rewards - just seeing the light in a child's eyes - even at university level, when they've understood something or succeeded in a task is awesome! Celebrate and recognize all the beautiful moments that come your way! Do the happy dance with your kids!

So glad you're back on track! Onward and upward!

Well got a call from an oncology office today and apparently my doctor/surgeon wants me to pursue radiation and I'm so scared and upset. I don't know if it's really worth all that I'll lose

John, radiation is NOT the end of the world! It is of course your own personal decision. My own opinion is that its always a good idea to try to hit it with everything you can so hopefully you do not ever have to deal with it again.

Ive seen alot of people come thru here. Some go thru rads and its no big deal. They have about a 5 month spell where they arent 100% and then its pretty much right back to their old lives. A year later you would never know they were sick at all. This is of course not everyone. You probably have seen alot of horror stories about radiation. Just remember everyone is different. The better your nutrition and hydration the easier you will have it.

Nest wishes with whatever you decide.

John - It is SO important what Christine said! My son's doctor was known for being very aggressive in treating cancer. My son had radiation and altho' it got pretty rough for a while, I am so glad he did! He's been cancer-free for over 5 years now and doing just great in every area of his life. Please do consider carefully what your oncologist recommends for you. There are so many knowledgeable and helpful people here at OCF to help you every single step of the way.

Hi John... I agree with both ladies. For a few reasons - firstly - you're so young and to have no precursors for this - I would want to make sure you nip it in the bud now - we've had a few young people come through here and sometimes it can be very aggressive in them. The upside is because you are so young you'll likely heal faster and be better able to handle the side effects. Secondly I'm of the theory that you should treat this type of cancer very aggressively - you may only get one shot at getting in front of it so throw the book at it while you can. You've done the primary treatment already - surgery removed everything visible - but on a microscopic level no one knows. That what rads and chemo does. It should take care of anything microscopic (stray cells) that may be lurking - rads will likely focus on your tongue and they'll paint the nodes - chemo - they will give you if they feel there's even the slightest chance there could be systemic involvement - also it weaken any cells giving rads a better chance at working (your lymph system is very similar to your veins and arteries and runs everywhere - despite the fact that you may have no tumorous nodes - that doesn't mean that there isnt a stray cell or two elsewhere - which chemo could also get.

My dr. told me - after removing 40 nodes (he's the top guy at one of the top 5 cancer centers in the word - and the top one in Canada) that in his opinion I was cured - and he was on the fence about giving me rads and chemo - but I did have neural involvement in my tongue, and ECE of my node (a little had leaked out) he was certain he'd gotten it all (he does a special surgical technique where he can actually see the cancer in real time while he's cutting - rather than working off an old CT) but just to be on the safe side he wanted me to do the extra - also he knew I wanted his treated aggressively. So I agreed, because I wanted to know that I'd done everything i could to prevent a possible recurrence - up front.

My rads guy said the same thng. He also said that radiation cuts the odds of recurrence in half.

Radiation is no picnic... It's hard - and brutal for some but the bottom line is its 8 -9 weeks of crap - (usually treatments are 30-35 with possible chemo (3 full doses - or 6-7 half doses depending on your hospital and dr. ) the first three weeks aren't generally too bad -then the rest gets progressively worse - the two weeks following your treatment are generally the worst! But then slowly you begin feeling better.

So a possible two months of your life to trade for better odds that you will have a "rest of your life" - there are of course no guarantees - everyone is different - everyone handles things differently - some breeze through - (i did 33 rads+ chemos - and was able to drink my nutrition throughout - and drive myself to my treatments daily - im 13 mos out of sugery 10 mos out of rads - and function at about 90 -95 % ) - and some really struggle. I think most fall in the middle. It's a tough choice - talk to your dr. find out why he's recommending it then go from there. There are lots of things available during treatment to help - pain meds, creams, antinauseants - an after there's physio, acupuncture, massage etc...

You'll get though it - its not easy - but doable.

Good luck! And hugs!

John,

I'm 17months out of radiation and i can tell you its DEFINITELY worth it!! Yes my life has changed but it is still a life worth living. I just turned 37 in January and i can tell you that my life is just as good as before radiation if not better! You hear about all the negatives and they tend to stay with you and make you scared but i've been through it, survived and is now living life to the fullest knowing that i did everything possible to kick cancer's ass!

I also just had a big piece of fillet steak for dinner tonight, while it didnt taste as good as before - i still enjoyed it!!

i hope my input helps with your decision.

Christine is right. You could get through the radiation and be back to life in a few months. Kevin went back to work the 5th of January. I never thought it would be that gast, but it was. He has a few side effects, but we are getting back to some normalcy.
If you don't do it, and chemo if they recommend it, there's probably a good chance you will battle this again. Look at it this way. If they have to cut more of your tongue out, that won't be good either.
You can do this. The benefits way out weigh the risks!! Go for it. We are here when you need to talk!! We've all been through it or cared for a loved one who went through it. We truly do know your thoughts and fears right now. But we are on the other side saying "jump in and wade through it!"

I think you're getting great advice here. Radiation is tough but dying in your twenties is a hell of a lot worse. I know it's a scary prospect but, as others said above, it's not the end of the world. I finished radiation six months ago and I am feeling really good at this point. Please talk to your doctors in depth to get a clear idea of why they are recommending radiation and maybe read through some of the stories on this forum to better understand what it will be like. If you still aren't sure, get a second opinion so you can be confident in whatever you decide.

John - DO IT!

John, I just want to add to what others are saying. If you have the radiation you will get through it. It's no picnic, but it is manageable. Talk with your doctor and if he thinks you should do it go ahead. I completed my treatments in August of 2009, went back to work part time in October, full time in November. I also had chemo. As Tracy said, it is tough, but dying in your twenties is tougher. You don't want to regret not throwing everything you can at this awful disease!

Thank you all. I will be going thru radiation you all helped me get their this. I don't know if in the coming months I'll be able to come on here as often so if you'd like to send a letter please PM me for my address. You have all helped me so much. I'd love a pen pal. Thanks.

Hi John:
Well, I see you do have to have radiation after all since we first corresponded, but like all these other wonderful members have agreed, better safe than sorry. You will do great! You're young, and will get through it just fine. Keep in touch with us, and prayers heading your way for a speedy recovery.
julieann

Keep up your nutrition and hydration while going thru treatments. It will make a huge difference on how easily you get thru this. Your age will help you get thru it easier than someone older.

John here is some info that can help you if you are struggling during your treatments. Its a list of places that offer help to cancer patients. Its from the main OCF pages.

Best wishes!

Financial Assistance for cancer patients

Go for it John!.. it is worth it.. my girl went thru it and came out OK!.. managed to kill the active nodes..

Things you need to practice is loads of liquid.. mouthwash...u will be good.. don't worry much...

Hi John,
I am really sorry to hear about this. I was 26 years old and my tongue cancer was discovered exactly like yours. I had a canker sore on my tongue that would not heal and after 4 months of going back and forth to the doctors, they performed a biopsy and discovered it was cancer. In April, 2011 it was stage 1 and I had a small piece of my tongue removed and a radical neck dissection. Unfortunately, my cancer returned and has been very aggressive. I am stage 3 now and had 60% of my tongue removed. I have a feeding tube and can't speak. I start radiation and chemo in 4-6 weeks. I am 27 now and struggling everyday.

Heal hopefully the rads will do the trick... Did they rebuild your tongue?

Hi, John! I wish you much success with your healing and hope you never hear that C word again! The healing will take time and your life will change, but always remember that you are a survivor!

Hello all. It's been a while since I've posted on this topic of mine. This week I'm officially half way thru radiation. My tongue is very raw, my saliva is thick and my tongue is so swollen I keep biting it in my sleep and have this horrible gashes that won't heal so I'm unable to talk. I'm very tired and require codiene and Xanax to be comfortable for any length of time. I haven't lost any weight yet but all I can eat is those boost shakes.
Half way thru!!!

You'll get there - and we're here to help!

Stay Strong John! I am 26 and just got out of surgery a week ago. Counting on you to get through this so I can too

John, my neck looked awful when I was halfway through rads. I couldn't even bring myself to look in the mirror, but it WILL get better. Hang in there!

We're all here cheering for you, John! You are brave and strong! Thank you for being a power of example and a testament as to what the human body can do when faced with such challenges!

3 more treatments and I'm done! Then I just have to heal.
Right now I'm just worried about how much time it will take for me to be able to talk without being in pain. My medical leave is only until the end of June and I really need my tongue to feel better a month from
Now.
I just can't believe it's almost over. It feels like just yesterday it was looming over my head and then it seems like I just started as well.
I truly won't miss it

My passion to get back to work isn't as strong this time. My boss told fellow co workers of mine to ignore my fundraiser and that I was just a beggar begging for money. I'm just eggar to get back to work so I can get back to theater and get my quality of life back.

It's too bad your coworkers aren't helpful... So people just don't get it. But it's your friends and family who matter the most everyone else is unimportant at this time. Hugs you will finish this, by the end of June you might be okay. I was feeling okay around the end of June last year mind you I finished rads may 4 so I had a few weeks.